Today’s Cinco de Mayo Hispandering Moment Brought to You by Vice President Biden

May 5, 2014
12:15 PM

Hey, everyone, did you know that today is Cinco de Mayo? You know what that means, right? All-out “Hispandering!” The following is from an actual press pool email we received today from the Office of the Vice President. Yes, of the United States. This guy.

Good morning from the Naval Observatory where your pooler is covering the Cinco de Mayo breakfast hosted by the Vice President and Dr. Biden.

A five-piece mariachi band is performing for guests. We are holding for remarks. No Corvette sightings.

The Office of the Vice President sends along the following background:

“Vice President Biden and Dr. Biden are hosting their third breakfast in celebration of Cinco de Mayo. Members of the Congressional Hispanic Caucus, National Hispanic Leaders, Hispanic Media and Administration Officials will be in attendance.”

What are we eating?


Of course we are.

And what are we talking about on this Cinco de Mayo? Clearly, the VP will maybe make mention of the date’s historical importance in U.S. history, right?


Not even close.

The email continues (guess what he talked about):

VPOTUS arrived by Marine Two at about 8:45 a.m. and proceeded upstairs to the residence. Pool was escorted into the residence at 8:55 a.m. Starting at 9:20, the Vice President spoke for about 18 minutes to a crowd of roughly 100, repeating his call for the House of Representatives to take up the Senate-passed immigration reform bill.

“The message is simple. We don’t have to redouble our efforts. We have to redouble or demand…” for the House to take up the bill.

“And it’s time for John—he’s a good man, John Boehner—to stand up and other Republicans to stand up. Not for us to stand up. We’ve already stood up. We’ve been right there. We stood up. It’s time for him to stand up, stand up at not let the minority—I think it’s a minority—of the Republican Party in the House keep us from moving in a way that will change the circumstances for millions and millions of lives.”

Biden said that passing immigration reform would be a “shot in the arm” for the country.

“To continue the dreams of all the American people, we have got to get 11 million people out of the shadows. It’s not just to benefit those 11 million people, it’s badly needed for the country. The country needs a shot in the arm and this would give it a considerable shot in the arm.”

Of course, Immigration! Because that is EXACTLY what people are talking about on Cinco de Mayo. How dare anyone actually want to talk about how many want reclaim the date. You know us Latinos, talking immigration ALL THE TIME!

According to the pool report, the following people were in attendance:

Secretary of Labor Tom Perez
Mexican Ambassador to the U.S. Eduardo Medina-Mora
U.S. Ambassador to Mexico Earl Anthony Wayne
Jose Diaz-Balart
Javier Palomarez | President & CEO USHCC
Anna Maria Chavez, CEO of the Girl Scouts of the USA
Nina G. Vaca, the Chief Executive Officer of Pinnacle Technical Resources
NYC City Council Speaker Melissa Mark-Viverito
White House Domestic Policy Council’s Cecilia Muñoz
Rep. Ruben Hinjosa
Rep. Xavier Becerra
OPM Director Katherine Archuleta
SBA Administrator Maria Contreras-Sweet

Biden also said this, “We share so much more in common with Mexico than just a border. We share values, a common history, and I think common dreams.”

As a bonus, the VP quoted Gabo (you know, the legendary Colombian author who recently passed away): “It’s not true that people stop pursuing their dreams when they became old. They become old because they stop pursuing their dreams.”

What does any of this have to do with Cinco de Mayo? Oh wait, it’s Hispandering time.

By the way, speaking of Biden and Mexico, this is what he said in 2007. Talk about patronizing, but what else is new when it comes to Tío Joe.